Remember how relaxed, joyful, and at peace the Buddha felt meditating in the garden as a little child. This is the feeling he came back to later in life when his practice became too hard. You can come back to this too. Always come back to the joy.
The idea of Zen is elusive because it is ungraspable. Sometimes that can feel frustrating. Just pay attention to how you live your life. The way you live this life is everything.
We are each a part of many sanghas: family, circles of friends, workplace, spiritual community, neighborhood, state, country, planet… What are some ways that you can nurture the sanghas you are a part of?
It is the nature of thoughts and sensations to arise and pass away again. Just sit still and watch them doing that. You don’t need to hang on to any of them.
If you’re tense and forcing anything in meditation, you’re probably trying too hard. Let go and simply observe the coming and going of all things in your current experience.